Mammoth night out

It was the night of the annual town ball, and the conjoined elephant twins were stuck at home without a stitch to wear between them, let alone a date.
'Is it because we're fat?' asked one.
'It is because we'd run up a mammoth bill at the bar?' asked the other.
'Is it because last time we went to a dance, we stomped the DJ to death?'
'He deserved it. No one can dance to that Celine Dion crap,' came the reply.
The twins sighed. They loved to dance, but finding partners was becoming increasingly difficult. A few of the townsfolk thought they were two-faced and wouldn't talk to them, and some people claimed there was nothing wrong with Celine Dion (clearly they were insane) and that it was high time the girls packed their trunks and moved away.
Finally, the twins had a solution: they would go to the ball, with each other as their dates! Quickly, before the sun set, they raced down to the bottom of the garden to pick a lovely daisy corsage. Then they gave the president of the Celine Dion fan club (who they had nailed to a fence post only a month earlier) a swift kick in the privates, as was their tradition on a Saturday night, and they were on their way.